It seems like when guys march into the kitchen, a lot of them make it a competitive arena. The ingredients have to be fresher, the techniques have to be fancier, and the tools have to be the most badass tools available for the job (I blame Alton Brown for the last. Have you seen his immersion blender?) And for myself, I tend to cook the way my mom does. I don’t have problems with canned vegetables. I do tend to bake from scratch, because I like to bake, but my tuna noodle casserole is most certainly not made with sushi grade ahi and cremini mushrooms. It’s made with Chicken of the Sea and Campbell’s Cream of Mushroom. I cannot evenly chop an onion to save my life. I use pre-chopped garlic from a jar. I own a Rachael Ray cookbook.

But I still love to cook, and it’d piss the hell out of me if someone was standing over my shoulder critiquing my technique; if I wanted that, I could go to culinary school.

I’m not saying all, or even most guys are like that, and maybe I’m getting all New York Times Styles here and building a trend from a couple of random data points. I don’t really think so, though. Food Network has gotten increasingly testosteronized over the past few years – the only pure cooking show left in primetime is Good Eats, and while I dearly love me some Alton, we’ve already mentioned his propensity for superpowered kitchen equipment. Other than that, it’s approximately 10 million competition shows and a few reality shows. The faces of baking is Ace of Cakes‘ Duff, mentioned by Rosin, and the dude from Cake Boss. I don’t watch Cake Boss, but he’s a burly Italian guy from Hoboken.

The fact is that increasingly, there are less and less female voices in the culinary press and pop culture, and as a woman who likes to cook, I worry about that. Do I want to be tethered to the stove? Not really. Do I want cooking to be yet another arena where I get mansplained to? No. I’ve got plenty of those as is.

I think I’ve mentioned before that I’m really not all that fond of Rachael Ray – I can’t watch her on tv, she just grates, endlessly – but to give her her due, I did rely heavily upon her approximately five years ago, when I was fresh out of graduate school, 1500 miles away from my mother’s cooking, broke as hell (heh, some things don’t change), and in need of dinner seven days a week.

I made a lot of Rachael Ray recipes those first two to three years, and while she’s slowly been phased out in favor of Jamie Oliver, Tyler Florence, Dave Lieberman, and Ina Garten, plus lots of food blogs and the ever popular Recipes Sent By My Mother…there are still one or two 30 Minute Meals I make.

And yes, they’re all soups. You know me so well.

There are two great things about this soup. First, it’s adaptable. Out of shallots? Yes, an onion works fine. No vegetable broth? I’ve made it with chicken and just plain water with no adverse effects. Craving bacon? Fry up a few slices and saute the onions/shallots and garlic in the fat. Can’t stand spinach? No one says you have to put it in.

The second great thing about this soup is that it takes fifteen minutes to make, and the most complicated part is chopping the shallots. Seriously, that’s it. It’s a great option when you’re exhausted and broke (otherwise known as: me.)

Homemade Tomato and Spinach Soup

1-2 shallots, minced

3 cloves garlic, chopped

3 T olive oil

1-28 oz can crushed tomatoes

1-28 oz can diced tomatoes, drained

2 C vegetable broth

1/2 bag of triple washed baby spinach

California Seasoned Pepper, to taste

Heat a large soup pot or dutch oven over medium heat, add olive oil. Meanwhile, mince shallots and chop garlic, tossing them in the pot when the oil’s hot. Saute for approximately five minutes, or until onion is translucent.

Pour in crushed tomatoes, diced tomatoes, and vegetable broth, stirring to combine. Season liberally with pepper. Simmer 10-15 minutes.

Dump in half the bag of spinach, stirring gently to wilt. Ladle into bowls, top with cheese.

And dinner’s done before the latest episode of Glee has gotten to the first song-and-dance number.

It ended up working out quite well, although we had to make some modifications when the dough wouldn’t come together. This might not have been necessary if my butter had truly been at room temperature. Recipe is based off of Jamie Oliver’s from Cook With Jamie, and can be modified with the flavorings you want – I had no lemon or lavender, so I went with orange flavor, and it was pretty good.

This is a thick dough, about the consistency of pie dough, so you won’t be able to pour it into the pan. Technically you’re supposed to roll it out to 1″ thick, but I work in a kitchen with no counter space, so I just flattened it in the pan.

Sort-of Shortbread

1 C plus 2 T unsalted butter, at room temperature

1/2 C plus 1 T superfine sugar, more for sprinkling

2 scant C AP flour, sifted

1 scant C cornstarch

2 t pure orange extract

The “Oh Shit, This Dough Is Too Dry” Ingredients

1 egg

2 T cold water

Cream together butter and sugar until pale yellow and creamy. Add extract, and then flour and cornstarch and mix gently until the dough comes together. (If it doesn’t, that’s when you add in the additional ingredients. The one egg I had left wasn’t enough, but a couple of tablespoons of water did the trick.)

Transfer to square baking dish and press into bottom until fairly even. Prick the top with a fork and bake for fifty minutes at 300F. When finished, sprinkle with additional sugar and cut while still warm.

But rest assured, this day will be appropriately celebrated. Just a little late.

It began when my brother bought me the Marshall Field’s Cookbook shortly after (may it rest in peace) its untimely demise at the hands of Macy’s, something that Chicago will collectively never forgive Macy’s for. The cover recipe of the book is, of course, the dish that started it all: the Marshall Field’s chicken pot pie that was first served to two well-off Fields customers by an extremely accomadating saleswoman.

I’ve worked in retail, and hell would have frozen over before I gave any customer at Sears my lunch. But I digress.

Pot pie is somehow something I’ve never gotten around to. The Fields version involves fussy chicken preparation and individual ramekins and really, at heart, I’m lazy. Extremely lazy. As it is, pot pie is strictly a weekend meal, and my version isn’t even that difficult.

My version is cobbled together from various versions floating around the internet with some inspiration drawn from Nick Malgieri’s recipe in The Modern Baker. It has a biscuit top, loads of tender dark meat chicken, onion, mushrooms, carrots and peas. It’s time-consuming – probably 6 hours in total – but easy as (wait for it) pie.

Chicken Pot Pie

1 1/2 lb boneless skinless chicken thighs

1 chopped Spanish onion

1 C chicken broth

8 oz sliced mushrooms

10 oz pkg frozen peas and carrots

1 can refrigerated buttermilk biscuits

1 C heavy cream

1 T butter

1 T flour

1 T poultry seasoning (I use Penzey’s Bicentennial Rub)

1 t pepper

White wine (optional)

Combine chicken thighs, chopped onion, broth, and poultry seasoning in a slow cooker and cook 4 hours on high (or 8 on low). Drain chicken, reserving broth, shred, and spread in an oiled casserole and allow to cool slightly.

Meanwhile, saute the sliced mushrooms in butter and white wine (optional, but awesome). Toss with chicken and onion mixture.

In a medium saucepan, make a roux with the flour and butter, cooking long enough to get rid of the pasty flour taste, and then add 1 C of reserved chicken broth and 1 C of heavy cream. Cook until thickened, season with pepper and stir in carrots and peas. Pour the sauce over the chicken, onion, and mushroom mixture and stir to coat before topping with biscuits. Bake for 30 minutes at 350F, or until biscuits are golden brown.

Look, a photo! It's like I'm a real food blogger or something!

Also, I live alone and I don’t need to eat a 12 cup bundt pan’s worth of cake. I like my jeans to continue to fit, thanks.

Muffins were the natural vehicle – they’re portable, work for breakfast or dessert and can be shared more easily than a large cake, especially when you rely on public transit, as I do. However, a 12-cup bundt probably would make at least 24 muffins, far more than I needed, so I also halved the recipe and make one or two other changes – such as omitting the vanilla in order to keep it more muffin-like rather than cupcake-like, and leaving out the salt, which wasn’t really necessary.

Apple Spice Muffins

2/3 C vegetable oil

1 1/2 C flour

1/2 t baking soda

1/2 T Penzey’s Cake Spice

1 C sugar

2 eggs

1-2 Granny Smith apples, peeled, cored, and chopped into 1/2″ pieces

Preheat oven to 350 and line a muffin tin with paper liners. Set aside.

Sift together flour, baking soda, and cake spice. In a separate bowl combine sugar, vegetable oil, and eggs, mixing until combined and pale yellow in color. Slowly stir in flour mixture. Fold in chopped apples.

Fill prepared muffin cups 3/4 of the way up with muffin batter and bake for 20-25 minutes or until golden on top.

The amount of apple you add depends entirely upon personal preference and size of the fruit. I added two, and it was almost too much; if you want more muffin and less fruit, stick with one.

Soup’s so easy, and hearty, and it’s getting to be that time of year when easy and hearty are pretty much how I eat. (In summer, it still has to be easy, which explains the many feta and mushroom pizzas and salad sandwiches that I consume from May to September) Anyway, I decided that I was in the mood for black bean soup this week. Given that I 1) get home at 7:30 and 2) am epically lazy, it was going to have to be in the crockpot. So I searched for crockpot specific recipes – there are a lot, but none of them were calling to me.

Which is, naturally, when we wing it. What I came up with below:

Black Bean Soup

1 Spanish onion, chopped

1 green bell pepper, chopped

1 jalapeno, seeded and chopped

2-3 cloves garlic, minced

6 slices of thick-cut bacon, cut into 1″ pieces with kitchen scissors

3-15 oz cans of black beans, drained

2-14.5 oz cans of diced tomatoes with green chiles

2 C chicken stock

3 T chili powder

2 T cumin

Fry bacon in skillet, then add chopped onions, peppers, and jalapeno, and cook in bacon fat until soft. When you’re about a minute from done, toss in the garlic. Drain.

Add bacon and vegetables to crock pot and top with black beans, tomatoes, chicken stock and spices. Cover and cook on low for 8-10 hours.

And that’s it. This is why I love my crockpot more than any other appliance, ever, people. Dinner in it is almost always this easy.

It’s based mostly on Kayotic’s recipe with a couple of modifications: I only used two onions because one of my Spanish onions was approximately the size of my cat’s head, dill rather than thyme because dill is the best thing ever, and a shot of light cream towards the end, because that’s never a bad thing. Top with crumbled herbed goat cheese and you’ve got a pretty awesome dinner.

Creamy Bread and Onion Soup

4-5 slices of sourdough bread, cubed

2-3 Spanish onions, sliced

3 cloves garlic, chopped

1 t dill weed

1 C milk

7 T butter, divided

2 1/2 C chicken broth

Salt and pepper, to taste

1/4-1/2 C light cream

Cube the sourdough bread and set aside while you slice the onions and chop the garlic. Onion slices should not be too thin or they’ll cook too quickly.

Dump the onions, garlic and dill weed into a pot with with 3 1/2 T of melted butter; cook for 20-30 minutes. Meanwhile, toast the bread cubes in a skillet with the remaining butter until golden brown.

Pour 1 C milk into the skillet and let the toasted bread cubes soak up the liquid.

When onions are soft but not caramelized, add chicken broth and bread and season with salt and pepper (or California Seasoned Pepper from Penzey’s, if you’re me). Stir to combine, add cream, and cook for an additional 10-20 minutes until thick.

Top with crumbled goat cheese and eat the hell out of it.

This was my Wustof chef knife’s inaugural adventure, and holy hell, that thing is easily the best knife I’ve used in my entire life. It went through the onions like they were butter.

I spend way too much time getting food out of the little serrated teeth. Way too much time.

Naturally, I chose the BIG one.

Am gamely resisting the urge to brandish it menacingly at irritating consultants.

Score.

This is a slightly modified version of the King Arthur Flour fudge brownie recipe, and its rich, moist, chocolatey, and not too sweet. I didn’t add the chocolate chips they called for (used pecans instead) and I’m glad, because I think that would have been too much chocolate for me.  This makes a square pan, which is more than enough for me; the original makes a 9×13 pan’s worth.

1/2 C (1 stick) butter

1 1/4 C sugar

2 large eggs

3/4 C dutch process cocoa

1/2 t salt

1/2 t baking powder

1/2 T vanilla extract

3/4 C AP flour

1 C chopped pecans

In a medium-sized microwave-safe bowl, or in a saucepan set over low heat, melt the butter, then add the sugar and stir to combine. Return the mixture to the heat (or microwave) briefly, just until it’s hot (about 110°F to 120°F), but not bubbling; it’ll become shiny looking as you stir it.

Crack eggs into a medium-sized bowl and beat with cocoa, salt, baking powder and vanilla until well combined. Remove sugar mixture for heat and add to cocoa mixture, beating again until the batter is smooth.

Add flour and nuts and combine, then spread into a square pan and bake for 30 minutes at 350°F, or until a knife inserted into the center comes out clean.

Highly recommended with vanilla ice cream or a tall glass of milk.